Do you believe in God and the after life?

There I was, gun to my head, and that was the question posed to me.  If I told my truth, would I face a horrible fate?  If I lied and said I believed, would it even make a difference?  And by the way, what kind of question is that for an Advanced Beginner conversation class?  I decided to tell my truth, by saying with irony, "One life is enough."  And then I sputtered on about how we're all energy, and after we die our energy continues in the universe among those who know and love us.  I was second to last among the six students.  Charley, from New York, spoke about how he loved going to church for the music but did not  believe in God.  Maria Luisa, the teacher, summarized the theological discussion by letting the class know that she was very Catholic and believed in heaven, hell, and purgatory for the sinners.

Sinners like my classmates.  Halvard, the Norwegian, answered the question with an expected level of Scandanavian skepticism.  Monique, from Sydney, told the class that she believes in "algo" (something) but not God.  Then continued to share her belief that she lived in ancient Rome in a past life.  Malcom, the Brit, did not even know who Adam & Eve were.  Not sure if biblical ignorance of that level is something to cheer, but go Malcom!  Only Alessandro, from Rome, professed to being Catholic, but his was definitely a cafeteria cultural catholicism.

I tried to make up for my atheism by answering Lucia's question about whether people liked tequila with an enthusiastic, "Absolutamente, tengo un collecion de tequila anejo." (Absolutely! I have a collection of aged tequila.)  Rather than winning her over, she appeared to roll her eyes as if she was thinking, "Of course you do you pretentious gringo heathen."

My greatest sin, however, was probably that I answered the question, "Do you like to dance?" with a definitive, "No me gusta bailar."  Lucia looked at me like I had just said, "I enjoy oral sex with aardvarks."  Even Malcolm, recently released from the British navy, professed to enjoy dancing, provided that he was drunk.  Halvar said that if he had drugs he enjoyed dancing.  Charley actually demonstrated the cumbia to the class.  Apparently, Lucia enjoys taking her classes out dancing.  She said, "I like to take my classes dancing.  Hector, the grammar teacher likes to take classes out to pulque bars.  I guess you won't be coming with us."

Fine with me.  I have always wanted to go to a pulque bar.  Besides, Hector is a very cute, very hip young man, with pierced ears and a pierced nose.  No doubt he knows the best pulque bars.  (Pulque is a drink dating back to Azetcs made of fermented agave.)